Tag Archives: Christopher Daniels

Everything Right with TNA Impact (07/05/12)

BULLY RAY PROMO on TWITTER (legal action)
Oh good… TNA has been bit by the Twitter bug. Those suck more than kajiggers… which burrow down into your skin. Bully questions Joseph Park has the pair of nuts to smack him in the face. Joseph Park comes down to the ring. The crowd is hot. Joseph gives Bully Ray a legal lesson with presidency. Abyss / Chris / Joseph Park has always had an impressive presence and even in a suit its no different. Joseph accepts the challenge with no rules. Bully Ray pulls out a paper… using the Christopher Daniels methodology of heat. It is a restraining order against Abyss.

AUSTIN ARIES BACKSTAGE w/ HULK HOGAN (good and brief)
This was good. Aries is a fresh, good character. Hogan wants the belt tonight.

DANIELS / DIXIE RECAP w/ DIXIE BACKSTAGE
Daniels says Claire Lynch is preggers. AJ Styles is the daddy! Mu-ah-ha-ha-ha. Then Dixie is backstage with the road agents. She is asked questions by the mysterious interviewer and there is no answers.

CRIMSON vs DEVON (quick match that sets up something for someone else)
Crimson loses his streak at the last pay-per-view and disappears from TV for 3 weeks… so he gets a title shot. At least show how Crimson has been winning at house shows. Why isn’t Crimson in the BFG Series? He was undefeated for 18 months. Devon is a gatekeeper for D level talent. I have no problem with Devon in this role. It keeps him strong and gives an evaluation of lesser talent. Crimson makes one of the crappiest pin attempts ever that somehow ends up with Devon on top. Quick match thank goth.

Madison Rayne comes marching to the ring. I think she wants some chocolate. Nope its someone else she wants. I fully expected this after a few months ago. This could build to a title reign for someone.

CHRIS SABIN PROMO (a heel needs heat)
Sabin is on crutches. He has some thick sideburns. It is a horrifying shame that he injured both ACLs, one after another. This has to be extremely discouraging since he’s not a main eventer. TNA probably doesn’t pay all the bills. He needs to have another job and that’s a shame. The fans are firmly behind him.

Out comes Robert Roode. This is another guy that should quit if he had two ACL injuries… even if he is a main eventer. He gets heat by verbally running him down and saying its just like every other X-Divisioner. Roode kicks out Sabin’s crutch. It really sucks that I feel anyone else could do the same job or better than Robert Roode. Austin Aries runs in for the save.

X-DIVISION >> DAKOTA DARSOW vs FLIP CASSANOVA (Dakota couldn’t keep up his end)
Dakota Darsow is the son of Barry Darsow. Nothing wrong with that. Flip looks like Sonjay Dutt… and the first words out of Mike Tennay’s mouth are Sonjay Dutt. Some sloppy high-flying from Flip Cassady off the bat, but he makes up for it with a backflip senton butt splash. Dakota Darsow is really struggling to keep up or even maintain himself. I hope Flip wins. Darsow has a long way to go. He’s got a good look, but I don’t see X-Division from him. I see TV title division. Dakota Darsow has a bloody nose. Good little match. Dakota Darsow didn’t keep up his end of the bargain.

Flip has some of Dakota’s blood on him. Flip waits to be interviewed and gets nothing…

BROOKE TESSMACHER & TARA BACKSTAGE
Brooke has a tag match with Tara. Tara calls her Boo 2x. Very quick.

GUT CHECK RECAP >> TAYLOR HENDRIX
She didn’t like that she was called not tough enough. The camera loves her and so do you fans. If only her name wasn’t Taeler Hendrix. I chose not to spell her name correctly, since she chose to say she’s a cancer survivor when she’s really a misdiagnosed. Like oh I thought I was pregnant, but it was just gas.

MADISON RAYNE & GAIL KIM vs BROOKE TESSMACHER & TARA (match makes Tara looks good)
Next week Gail Kim gets her title shot… I thought it was this week, but whatever. It should probably be on the pay-per-view. Does anyone remember when it was Terra? Mike Tennay mentions the main event, James Storm vs Jeff Hardy. I totally forgot. This match was quicker than most TNA knockout’s matches. Short match, more of a win.

JAMES STORM LOCKDOWN RECAP w/ JEFF HARDY MATCH HYPE
James Storm recaps Lockdown then talks about Jeff Hardy. Not much here.

AJ PROMO on CHRISTOPHER DANIELS (dropping the angle)
He yells out at Christopher Daniels…. who thankfully comes out to save this segment. Don’t let AJ Styles talk about this ever. KAZ comes out with Daniels and says AJ gets junkie whores pregnant. Daniels has a martini glass… an empty one from the look of it. Christopher Daniels starts some long-winded speech and AJ just tells him to shut up. Holy shit this feud has been going on for a full year. That’s not a compliment. That’s a … let’s move on! I consider the Claire Lynch angle officially dropped by TNA.

HULK HOGAN BACKSTAGE interrupted by MASKED MAN
Hogan doing an interview, gets interrupted by one of the masked men that attacked Sting a few weeks ago. He delivers a piece of paper with some carts on it. At least they mentioned the angle.

JEFF HARDY VIDEO
He’s inspired by this series since he missed last year’s series. He wants to end the selfish generation. I kind of thought Jeff Hardy lead the selfish generation what with the drugs and house explosions.

X-DIVISION >> KENNY KING vs LARS ONLY (another X-division match)
Kenny King from ROH and I think from WWE Tough Enough season 2. Good to see someone from any Tough Enough season in still in wrestling. Good match, longer and less reckless than the other match. Lars did some sort of leg trip, leg sweep that looked painful to Kenny King. Tazz said it sucked, but I think that’s how it was supposed to look… painful. I don’t have much to say about this match. I think Christie Hemmy announced Kenny as Kenny Kane.

Christie interviews Kenny King. The fans are behind him in more ways than one.

I’ve come to realize that none of TNA’s own X-Division guys has a match on TV even if they’ll get matches on the Destination X pay-per-view. Bring in new guys and have them go for the title. If anything hopefully Sonjay Dutt will get the X-Division title.

AUSTIN ARIES BEFORE THE BELL PREVIEW (good show everyone seems to love it)
I’ve seen the Before the Bell special with Austin Aries. It is full of good phrases. So many good phrases, you don’t even need to watch it, just listen for 30 minutes which 24 of it is Austin Aries talking.

KENNY KING & AUSTIN ARIES BACKSTAGE (good rub for Kenny King)
They know each other… and they’re happy. Good rub for Kenny King who then disappears so Austin can get asked about relinquishing the belt. Yep.

BFG LEADERBOARD
James Storm > Samoa Joe > Magnus > Kurt Angle

BFG SERIES >> JAMES STORM vs JEFF HARDY (Storm sells for Hardy)
Wow this main event is starting early. It makes me think Claire the junkie slut will be the main event. Jeff Hardy comes out looking like a performance artist on coke. He shares a moment with the crowd. It must suck that Jeff Hardy is still over James Storm. Even if Hardy loses 100 times to Storm… it will still be Jeff Hardy > James Storm. There are plenty of dueling chants. There are a lot of lockups and holds… because this is the main event and they have the time. They come back from commercial and Tazz talks about how crazy it got in the commercial with a street fight on the outside… yet no video clips. It is so hilarious watching James Storm sell for Jeff Hardy, who is too weak to muscle him into selling. Like a leg trip, you see James Storm start falling before Jeff Hardy pulls him. You see the camera angles shift so viewers don’t see the miss between Jeff Hardy’s feet and Storm’s face. Now 100% of the fans are behind Jeff Hardy… who has 90% of the offense of this match. But when James Storm gets a move, Jeff Hardy sells like he’s dead for way too long. But whatever. Good match, gives fans time to get invested in the outcome.

After the match, the winner gives the loser a handshake. Good clean match.

BFG LOCATION
Mike Tennay and Tazz announce that Bound for Glory is going to Phoenix, AZ.

BACKSTAGE w/ KURT ANGLE then MR. ANDERSON
They both briefly talk about the BFG Series and Tennay plugs Mr. Anderson vs Kurt Angle. Then Brooke Tessmacher vs Gail Kim. Bully Ray vs Joseph Park.

HULK HOGAN ANGLE w/ …
This puts a lot of heat on Austin Aries. Anyway, Hogan does a good job of plugging Destination-X, Jeff Hardy, James Storm and Austin Aries. Robert Roode comes out. Robert Roode is so generic. Like he checks all the boxes that meet with a great heel… except for personality. As I’ve pointed out before the real feud seems to be Hulk Hogan & Robert Roode. Roode always has great points. I just wish it was coming from someone better. Austin Aries comes out… Austin Aries gives this match and Roode’s title heat.

lol when Austin and Roode get in each other’s faces… the fans chant for Hogan. Aries ends up holding up both belts and it looks awesome. Great job TNA. Aries gives Hogan the X-Division title and holds up the TNA world title to close the show.

How TNA can salvage the AJ Stylez and Dixie Carter pregnant lady reveal

So… my thoughts on this Dixie / Stylez angle revealing they were helping a pregnant woman get help from drugs and one night stands… Yes it was beyond stupid with plenty of plot holes such as why would KAZ turn on AJ for helping the woman unless he is the baby’s father… but since I can’t go back in time to fix it, I can salvage this angle, Daniels should go nuts and say no no, you’re not getting out of this. I know what happened, KAZ knows what happened and we have someone that saw with her own eyes what happened. (however this will face Daniels and make AJ & Dixie heels) Next week they bring that person out. That person is KAZ’s wife Traci Brooks. … Traci is the reason why KAZ believes it now. She saw them at the hotel and mentioned it to Daniels who went overboard and discovered the stranger than fiction truth that Dixie’s husband Serge had a vesectomy and can’t have kids so Dixie the millionaire had one of her AJ fertilized eggs put into a serrogate mother who faked being an addict and that piece of paper Daniels kee…ps showing is the hospital bill for the serrogate motherism. Then the mother in 2 weeks can say yes… it was all true. You two have ruined my life… people will think she means KAZ & Daniels, but she’ll really mean AJ & Dixie, because when a bad actress turns on two loved people that makes her the heel and the loved people are the faces.
Then that mother hooks up with a wrestler and gets into his mind to send that wrestler after AJ. There, 2 months of storylines. Then she has the baby and AJ proves that it wasn’t his sperm that made the baby… it was Daniels. Leading the fans to chant… Daddy Daniels. That will result in an extra month of storyline.
Are there any plot holes to what has already been done with the storyline?

Everything Wrong with TNA Impact (and how it should be) (in my mind) (6/21/12)

TNA OPENING RECAP (brief, but star making)
Roode recap. Aries recap. Good stuff… because they’re faces. People care about both of them. Aries is on fire. Brief recap. TNA has been getting a lot better lately. Like I can’t wait for TNA Impact every week. I’m not the only person saying that.

HULK HOGAN & AUSTIN ARIES ANGLE (headed to Aries execution)
As much as I don’t care what Hogan has to say… I think… he’s not Robert Roode or HHH starting off a 2 hour wrestling show… so that makes me happy. Tonight is Gut Check and Open Fight Night. TNA will have its first female Gut Check challenger. They’ve also got the Bound for Glory Series. I’m actually looking forward to this.

Hogan wants an answer from Aries if he will give up his X-Division championship for a title shot at Robert Roode at Destination X. See this is a terrible idea, a bad idea and a good idea all at once. It is a good idea, because Austin Aries doesn’t need to be beat to give up a low-end title. It is a bad idea because I’d much rather see Aries vs AJ Stylez main event Destination X and its a terrible idea, because Roode’s storyline trumps Austin Aries career. Aries should not come to an end. If anything Aries should be the man to take the belt even if the angle is designed for James Storm to get the top title.

Austin Aries wants any X-Division champion to have the opportunity to give up the title for a top title shot at the Destination X. Good idea I guess, since it puts heat on the belt… once a year. Robert Roode comes out and blah blah blah. It ends in a hockey fight. Yes a shirt pulling hockey fight before its broken up. Then Mr. Anderson appears with microphone in hand. He doesn’t have his blonde hair. Don’t ever let Anderson talk. Anderson says he’ll win the Bound for Glory Series. Please no. Oddly enough Mr. Anderson wasn’t terrible on the microphone. He was okay.

BOUND FOR GLORY SERIES SCORE SYSTEM (Thank goth they talk about it.)
Same as last year. Good idea to show how scoring is done. Still lose 10 points for a DQ and there is now a 10 minute time limit for each match. Good. I like that. Gives a chance for draws.

BFG >> MR. ANDERSON vs CHRISTOPHER DANIELS (good for its clean victory)
Mr. Anderson challenges Christopher Daniels. Again, don’t let Mr. Anderson talk. Christopher Daniels comes out with an appletini. I remember this match from a month ago. Very meh in terms of crowd heat compared to most TNA matches in the past few months. Good clean finish. Thank you TNA. I laugh at how Mike Tenney calls something a patented move… when so many people do it. The victory celebration is silly if not dumb.

AJ & DIXIE BACKSTAGE (time filler)
She wants to tell everyone… This is a time filler. We saw 2 of these last week. I expect to see 2 more tonight.

BROOKE HOGAN w/ ODB / MICKIE JAMES / VELVET SKYE / MADISON RAYNE (pretty bad)
This was done reality style… They’re discussing who gets the Knockouts title. Brooke wants to know why they want the title. This does put heat on the Knockouts title. Wow this does not make any of the four glow in a positive light. This was designed to make Brooke Hogan look good and like the only sane person.

BFG >> ROBBIE E vs KURT ANGLE (effective)
Robbie E does a good open challenge that is answered by Angle. I predict a destruction of both Robbie E and Rob Terry. Great victory. Made the winner look very effective.

TAYLOR HENDRIX GUT CHECK VIDEO (interesting story)
She’s got red hair. That’s what’s missing from wrestling. None of her footage had red hair. In fact her footage makes her look like Mickie James this is a plus for her… but not Mickie. She announces that she was diagnosed with cancer at age 21.

BFG >> MAGNUS vs AJ STYLEZ (an ok match too short to be good)
This episode of Impact is going by quick. Magnus calls out someone, it goes to commercial. I have a feeling its Joe. Nope its AJ Stylez. Funny how all of these open challenges call out home wreckers. ODB should call out the Wedding Planner next. Magnus catches AJ off the top rope with a ragdoll catch then turns it into a suplex. That looked good. AJ misses a Pele kick. Apparently what he and Dixie are going through is messing with him. Daniels & KAZ interfere. At least they haven’t interfered in a while.

GUT CHECK >> TAYLOR HENDRIX vs TARA (give her a job)
She looks like she’s in the hot girl marching band… implants… so she’ll fit in with TNA’s abnormal sized implants. Tara comes down to the ring. Good choice. I would have had Gail Kim, but I guess Gail has more of a character. So what do we grade here? Her ability to sell? Do we grade Taylor Hendrix ability to mimmick Mickie James?

I say give Taylor Hendrix a TNA contract. She’s hot with crisp work and mega implants that TNA loves. We haven’t seen a new knockout in at least a year. Get rid of Angelina Love or Winter. What have they done lately?

In fact since Brooke Tessmacher hasn’t been here this week, they can have Taylor get a job next week and have Brooke return to say She’s not Taylor… she’s some stalker from my former sorority!

JOSEPH PARK & BULLY RAY BACKSTAGE (too brief to be gold)
Bully Ray bullies the giant Joseph Park who brings up his brother… Bully Ray doesn’t want to see Joseph Park in the crowd. This was good… stoopid bastad.

BFG >> SAMOA JOE vs JAMES STORM (on the verge of good, but not long enough)
Since no one has the guts to call out Samoa Joe, he calls out James Storm. Should be good, but every match on this show has been 2 – 4 minutes. A win is a win even if its not really a match. Tazz & Tennay hype the fact James Storm has been away from active competition. There is a dueling chant… which is good. Joe dumps James on his head with a power slam. After the match Joe comes at James Storm with a beer bottle… I won’t ruin what happens next.

AJ / DIXIE / DANIELS ANGLE VIDEO RECAP
Yep AJ & Dixie have a surprise for Serge. It’s probably like an autograph from Serge’s favorite baseball player. Good recap of a terrible angle that gives AJ an excuse to lose.

AJ & DIXIE BACKSTAGE (again)
Time filler… AJ wants to get it done tonight. It’s funny because last week AJ wanted it done… then he didn’t and Dixie wanted to. Now this episode starts its Dixie that wants to… and now its AJ. Well now that everyone’s on the same page.

BROOKE HOGAN w/ 3 of the 4 women (too quick to be as bad as it could)
Eh its getting sane. Brooke is kinda pointing out how silly the women are. And someone leaves. Quick.

BFG >> BULLY RAY vs POPE (The ghost of Abyss)
… Pope is back after being gone 6+ months. Crimson was undefeated for 18 months. Why is he not in this series? Whatever. Anyway, comes down to the ring and challenges Pope. Bully Ray needs a racist gimmick to make up for all the black men he beats down. So I guess RVD vs Jeff Hardy will be the main event… I predict another 2 – 4 minute match between Bully Ray and Pope. Interestingly Pope has a punching / elbow combination just like Bully Ray has a punching combo. At some point Abyss comes through the crowd. Terrifying some of the ring rats at ringside. Abyss is just like a ghost haunting Bully Ray.

HOGAN BACKSTAGE w/ JEFF HARDY & RVD
Makes Jeff Hardy vs RVD… yup.

DESTINATION X TRAILER w/ AUSTIN ARIES
Its awesome. Makes him look like a star.

MONTGUMARY GENTRY MUSIC VIDEO starring VELVET SKYE
So she’s a single mother? Or its just acting. This is more Velvet’s video than Montgumary Gentries. They don’t show all of it… but this just proves… get big implants so you can be a star. Even reality shows know the value of implants.

BROOKE HOGAN BACKSTAGE w/ 2 of 4 FINALISTS
This might as well have been a beauty pageant. Quite the shock outcome. Kept quick.

KNOCKOUTS TITLE >> TESSMACHER vs FINALIST
Congrats to TNA for making a new female star with Miss. Tessmacher. Beautiful moves from the finalist. Lots of butt shots from the camera. I wish I didn’t have to report on that… but that’s where the cameras are. This match will probably do TNA’s biggest rating of the night… even with the terrible build. Miss Tessmocher is selling more than Taylor Hendrix. Good clean finish.

BFG >> RVD vs JEFF HARDY (failed to interest me)
Yep its a match. I remember when people would pay for this match. To be honest I had no interest in this match. Two flat guys having the same match for the 1,000th time. It isn’t any better, it isn’t any worse. No heat is put on the match since there’s an angle on top.

PROS

  • Austin Aries in TNA
  • Christopher Daniels appletini
  • Some clean wins in the BFG!
  • Winner of Robbie E & Kurt Angle looked very effective
  • Taylor Hendrix
  • TNA letting the winners celebrate… almost as long as the matches.

CONS

  • No Sting storyline continuation. He was attacked by 3 masked me, Jeff Jarrett and the Harris brothers (I think).
  • Very little build for Destination X… but I guess you need to have an X-Division to have an X-Division pay-per-view.
  • Robert Roode talking
  • Mr. Anderson talking
  • Knockouts discussing why they want the Knockouts title… *shakes head*
  • AJ’s head not in the game… I’d much rather not see him on his year long losing streak.
  • Gut Check as a whole. What are we evaluating? A person’s ability to lose?
  • Tag champs not wearing their championship belts. Did anyone remember they are tag champs?
  • Backstage with Knockouts, but it was kept quick
  • I’ve seen RVD and Hardy too much to care… but that can be said a lot about any match in TNA.
  • No Devon defending the TV title. Not that it matters, but it was said… defending it on every Impact. Maybe he’s on Xplosion.
  • Over run lead to no conclusion with the Dixie and AJ angle… the main event.

Everything Right with TNA Impact (06/14/12)

JAMES STORM VIDEO OPENING (thank god its not Robert Roode)
Very good to say he’s back. Makes him a star. Especially good because he’s not Robert Roode. Brief recap from the past two months.

X-DIVISION TITLE ULTIMATE X >> ARIES vs SABIN vs ZIMA ION (great, hot opener)
On paper this looks awesome, should be an awesome opener. It shouldn’t be thrown out there cold like this, but X-Division matches don’t need any preface, they should get over because they’re X-Division. If Aries were to lose this would be a good opportunity to drop the belt and move up the card. Of course you could also move the X-Division up the card. The fans are quiet because they’re paying attention and popping for offense with a few chants. Thank goth Robert Roode didn’t start the show. He kills all energy. The TNA ring looks bigger. Tazz and Tennay announce that the BFG series is back, which is great if done correctly. BFG Series should be a round robin style tournament instead of tags or three ways.

This match was great, made Aries look like a star as always. He is a clear cut star. This made him look like an incredible star in only five minutes. Unfortunately the other two didn’t shine as bright. TNA gives the winner a little time to shine after the match. Chris Sabin looks to have injured his knee. If that’s true, that’s horrible.

AUSTIN ARIES PROMO (white hot)
Aries talks about how a year ago he walked in and beat everyone. That is absolutely true. Aries wants to move up, he wants to be higher. Enter Hulk Hogan. Aries can become a giant in the BFG series. He can be a huge star in Destination X and main event it against AJ Styles. Hogan says he hears all the hoopla. Aries should be the man in the main event like AJ Styles should have been five years ago. Aries can carry the company and have five star matches with heat with anyone. The crowd is very hot for this segment. Aries wants in the main event. Hogan makes a match for Destination X. Aries vs Bobby Roode. But only if Aries gives up the title. Aries should give up the title. Hell he should get the TNA top title. However, its too early. There’s zero chase, especially now that James Storm is back. Aries should win the BFG Series… and still give up the belt. Not now but in 3 months. Defend the belt against AJ as the main event of Destination X.

SLAMMIVERSY MOMENT w/ DIXIE CARTER (too short)
TNA shows a recap of Slammiversary. Its great for making the company look bigger. Then it just cuts off.

JOSEPH PARKS EATING BACKSTAGE interrupted by BULLY RAY (too brief to be gold)
Bully wonders where Abyss is. Funny how its gone 180. Now Bully Ray wants Abyss. This was kept short, but eh. Not gold.

TV TITLE >>DEVONvs HERNANDEZ (makes sense)
You know it makes sense… Hernandez won a match, so he gets a title shot. Brilliant. I feel Hernandez can be better utilized as mega face forMexico. He can throw around guys and be the pride ofMexico… even if he’s a Texan. SuperMex kicks off the match with a running body press over the top to the outside. Crowd is hot, probably hotter than they were for the opening match. WithDevon’s track record of people interfering in his matches… You’d expect that with this… but no.

DIXIE & AJ STYLES BACKSTAGE (brief)
AJ can’t do this anymore… He wants to get it out in the open. Bet it’s a surprise party or something for Serge.

BFG SERIES ROYAL RUMBLE >> AJ / RVD / JOE / BULLY RAY / MAGNUS / ANGLE / STORM / POPE / HARDY / ROBBIE E / DANIELS (good stuff)
The winner gets 20 points in the BFG Series. I have no problem with something special like that when they’re all involved as long as everyone is in it and everyone has an even number of matches. So this was done Royal Rumble style where a new person enters every 90 seconds. It starts with the biggest stars before it works down the ladder. The Pope DiAngelo DiNero appears for the first time in half a year. Abyss appears, but he’s not in it. AJ Styles and Kurt Angle don’t wear their belts. Huge chants throughout a lot of the match. So far this might be the hottest match on the show. Good finish, the winner looks like the star and the loser looks like he’ll get revenge

JAMES STORM PROMO (crowd goes nuts and they’re firmly behind Storm)
Mega chants for this guy. Crowd wants to hear what he says and pop for the things he says. See it sucks that Aries will lose at the next PPV and end up without a belt when the main event story arc is setup for James Storm to win it after he wins the BFG Series. Anyway, James Storm is back in a big way. The crowd goes nuts.

ROBERT ROODE BACKSTAGE (meh)
They’ve got a new TMZ interviewer. The voice is different. This segment was pretty much to let you know he’s on the card.

AJ STYLES & KURT ANGLE BACKSTAGE
Kurt is angry with AJ for messing up and yells at him to clear his head of theDixie stuff. Angle has an intensity in a good way. AJ promises to get focused.

BROOKE TESSMACHER vs MADISON RAYNE (an ok match)
It’s shocking to think TNA has turned a corner and everyone is mega over to their crowd. This match seems to be the downer for the crowd. They’re still paying attention and into it, but quiet. But when Tessmacher yells to the crowd they respond big. Nothing wrong with this match. Can’t say it made Brooke look like a star.

BROOKE HOGAN BACKSTAGE w/ GAIL KIM
Brooke wants Open Fight Night with a 4 way Knockouts title. I didn’t think Open Fight was for another 2 weeks. Eh whatever. This was an OK segment, nothing notably wrong or right.

MR. ANDERSON BACKSTAGE
Hey he’s got dark hair and not blonde. He looks like a totally different guy. Very brief 10 seconds.

TNA TITLE >> ROBERT ROODE vs MR ANDERSON (good psychology)
Thank goth Anderson hasn’t really talked this episode. He doesn’t even introduce himself. Good. Strip him of talking and he’s totally fine and he’s been improving in the past few months in the ring. The match starts with 30 minutes left on the show, which normally means a 20 minute angle at the end of the show and yep they still have the AJ & Dixie thing. This episode was very quick with what felt like a lot of wrestling.

I have no interest in this match even if they’ve built a 2 month history with them. It just doesn’t feel like the main event, especially because its not. One good thing I do have to say about this match is that it’s a good fight. Like its not easy for them to do things. It’s a competition for headlocks. Like a struggle. And that’s good. Great victory.

DIXIE & AJ STYLES BACKSTAGE (again)
They say the same thing, but this time they hug.

IMPACT RECAP (a great idea)
This was good, because it showed everything you may have forgotten keeping it fresh in your mind. Other shows do this and even Internet top 10 lists recap the previous 9 before the #1.

STING VIDEO (made Sting look big)
Sting is the first wrestler to make it to TNA’s Hall of Fame. Sure it’s a joke right now, but in 10 years from now it will be prestigious. Plenty of backstage interview clips putting over Sting’s importance. Good. It made Sting look big. Monumental.

STING SPEECH (and what happens)
Don’t focus on his loss to Robert Roode. Focus on how awesome Sting is! Sting’s face paint looks like a gothic circus clown. The fans chant for Sting. Sting knows there are other people that deserve the honor like the Jarretts. Three masked men attack Sting! Big masked men. They get major heel heat. The fans chant for Hogan. I think the masks are Smoke from Mortal Kombat.

PROS

  • Hot Opener
  • Austin Aries looked like a star
  • Aries & Hogan interaction
  • Hernandez getting a win before his TV title shot
  • Devonis strong
  • Hot Royal Rumble match
  • Joe in the rumble
  • Daniels in the rumble taking out 2 people
  • James Storm is mega over
  • Angle wanting AJ to get his head in the game.
    No talking from Mr Anderson and Robert Roode.
  • It felt like there was a lot of wrestling.
  • Main event match victory
  • Recap of the show just before the main event angle.
  • The main event angle

CONS

  • Too much too soon for Austin Aries when he will get stopped by Roode

Everything Right with TNA Impact (05/31/12)

LUMBERJACK MATCH >> ROBERT ROODE vs STING (Great opener… that should have closed the show)
TNA likes you to know who’s on the roster, so they have episodes start with everyone on the roster. Bobby Roode gets a ‘you suck chant’. Last week I would have had his confetti rain Sting Joker cards. I can’t see this match drawing in fans. There aren’t a lot of lumberjacks around the ring. There is really zero build to this match which seems a negative.

Commentators point out Roode injured Sting… coulda swore Sting injured himself. TNA uses Twitter and Facebook visuals. Rowdy crowd in a good way. Throughout the match Roode throws out Sting a notable amount. Good strategy.

POST MATCH with HOGAN
Hogan comes out and announces Sting vs Roode at the next PPV. And the world title will now be on the line. … Tennay and Tazz announce Styles vs Daniels and fans pick Devon’s challenger. ooo and Brooke Hogan.

MADISSON RAYNE BACKSTAGE
She’s ironing her sash… she says everything will go well with Brooke Hogan.

BULLY RAY CALLS OUT JOSEPH PARK (gold)
These two are gold. Bully shows a replay of what he did to Joseph Park. Bully wants a fight right now. Joseph looks around who me? Gives the fans his stuff. The fans love it. This is a hot, energized crowd. Joseph doesn’t want to fight, so Bully calls the whole family cowards especially Abyss. Joseph jumps over and security stops him. Bully Ray has great heat. Fans are chanting fight! Joseph doesn’t want  any part of Bully Ray, so Bully says he pleads guilty! Joseph grabs him and the fans love it. Bully says if you hit me I’ll sue you. Fans chant what they want. Joseph backs off. He has class. Bully leaves, Joseph says he wants a fight right now. Bully says they’ll finally fight at Slammiversary.

CRIMSON VIDEO (good lil recap)
This was a nice video recapping his winning streak… even though he has been pinned in tag matches. Crimson then says he can’t be beat.

X-DIVISION TITLE >> AUSTIN ARIES vs CHRIS SABIN (putting over a star)
Supposedly Alex Shelley is gone from TNA so this makes sense. Austin Aries is backstage spraying his hair and he sprays Joe who is walking behind him.  This should be the best match on the show… and this is a show with Daniels and AJ. Dueling chants which is good…  Some amazing and unique moves from Aries who is the hottest thing on TNA. This match was all about Sabin taking abuse and making Aries look like gold. Some incredible offense from Sabin as well. Quite the back and forth. Tazz had no idea what Sabin’s finisher is… in fact the crowd probably didn’t know either since he’s been gone

HOGAN BACKSTAGE with TAZZ
Hogan talks about stepping up or leaving. Hogan wants Tazz for Gut Check. Tazz warns him that the real Tazz is a jerk. Tazz would be good at evaluating talent since he has run dojos and finishing schools.

BACKSTAGE with TAZZ, BRUCE PRICHARD & AL SNOW talking about JOEY RYAN
They discuss his look and his gimmick. Bruce doesn’t like his gimmick, the other two love it. I love his look. Bruce points out fans thought he was better Alex Sylvia. Indeed. Absolutely. Tazz points out that Joey Ryan didn’t look like he was gonna be in the fight of his life. Meh bad comment. He didn’t blow away Bruce even if Joey was memorable. Tazz looks like he’ll say no. Tazz doesn’t look good on a couch, he should sit forward to make him look less fat.

TV TITLE CONTENDERS (brief)
Jeff Hardy, RVD, Ken Anderson & Robbie E. 3 of these guys are too good for the belt. Jeff Hardy gets the biggest pop. This was a nice lil popularity contest.

DIXIE APPEARS (to introduce Brooke)
She says TNA will be 10 years old in 10 days. She also announces Slammiversary will have a TNA Hall of Fame induction. She then introduces Brooke Hogan who gets plenty of boos… and then cheers. She comes out to a country song. I like how Dixie has to introduce Brooke so the fans respect Dixie so they won’t boo Brooke as much.

DANIELS & KAZ BACKSTAGE
They’re miffed at Dixie not aknowledging their angle.

TV TITLE MATCH >> DEVON DUDLEY vs ???
The man that won did it with 40% of the vote. Tennay presses Tazz for his vote on Joey Ryan. Tazz doesn’t know. This match seems to be used to plug everything else going on in TNA. Dueling chants from the crowd. The crowd is still hot, but this is the coldest of the hot. Match ends like you’d expect it to. Robbie E and Rob Terry do a run in. If this will be a match at the PPV, it will be better than Devon and Garrett.

JAMES STORM VIDEO (with his daughter, horse and smell hound)
James talks about how he’s simple. Simple man wouldn’t wear those designer jeans with the holes intentionally put in. Yep looks like James is fine walking away. Must suck having cameras ask him about Roode every so often. Storm’s daughter asks if that means he’s going back to wrestling. James cuts off the cameras.

DANIELS & AJ RECAP
Ugg this feud… Capped off with the monthly Daniels vs AJ match.

GUT CHECK JUDGING with AL SNOW, TAZZ & BRUCE PRICHARD on JOEY RYAN
I still say give Joey Ryan a contract, but whatever. Joey comes out to serious music without a serious look. This music kinda makes him seem like an out of place chump. 4 men in suits standing in front of a 70s playboy pilot. He does his best Ron Burgondy  impression. Bruce even mentions Ron Burgondy. Bruce points out with Joey having 12 years in the business the verdict is no. Crimson and Gunner have 12 years. But TNA already has Aries and Aries is more serious. Al Snow doesn’t like Joey Ryan… but votes yes. Makes no sense, but whatever.

Joey cuts a good promo about how he has 87% of the fan’s vote he questions Bruce having a job. Tazz says no, because that promo sucked. Tazz isn’t a suplex machine, he’s a commentator. 2 nos. It actually seemed like 3 nos. Maybe Joey is a dick.

ROBERT ROODE VIDEO IN LONDON
He did an interview this week. Yay. Interesting outdoor backdrop of Big Ben. He’s standing at the base of Big Ben. Roode says he’s the longest running TNA champion and the fans off screen cheer him.

CHRISTOPHER DANIELS vs AJ STYLES
Wow a main event that promises more revealed. Time for the monthly Daniels and Styles match. I couldn’t care less. Tazz feels he has to justify himself about Joey. Tazz’s reasons don’t make sense that the character doesn’t have legs. Sure it does, he can get serious, but I guess TNA wanted him to get Aries serious and not just a stereotype.

Good match. Hot crowd. This was the match of the show. Good main event. KAZ looks a lot like Crimson now from a distance. It was very dumb of him to shave his head even if he was losing his hair. Post match beatdown. Kurt Angle saves AJ. Daniels and KAZ get their head back and use zip ties to trap Angle. The zip ties fail miserably.

Daniels has a phone conversation with Dixie. Dixie comes out and yells to turn it off! Dixie gets bleeped out.

PROS:
A hot and energized crowd
TNA is live
Arena seems bigger… maybe they are on the road?
Great opener
Bully Ray & Joseph Park
Sabin vs Aries
Putting heat on the TV title with the vote
TNA firing on all cylenders.

CONS:
Little build to Sting vs Roode
Mind numbing birth control commercials on DailyMotion

Everything Right with TNA Impact (05/17/12)

TNA RECAP (good work)
Word on the street is that TNA Sacrifice was a good show. TNA opens by recapping a few of its biggest angles. Roode being dominant, AJ having pictures, Abyss returning and so on.

ROBERT ROODE PROMO (another post PPV promo)
Roode had a big match off a hot pay-per-view in this case I do want to hear from him. Not nearly as much as I want to hear Joseph Park. Tennay plugs the fact that Robert Roode is about to beat AJ’s record for the longest TNA champ. They should really have someone challenge him on Open Fight Night one night before it becomes official. Fans boo him and Robert soaks it up by saying that’s it chant Roooooode! Roode says he’ll throw a party next week. He’ll call it celebration of domination. He calls out Hogan.

Hogan comes out to quite the pyro display for TNA. Fans politely clap for Hogan and don’t go too crazy. Robert Roode has demands. This was entertaining compared to what Roode normally does. He wants only green M&Ms and golden confetti flown from Canada… Hogan says Robert Roode put the company back on track by holding the title. He may have put the company back on track… but he didn’t set it on fire.

Hogan announces Roode to have a title defence at Open Fight Night. Nice. Hogan took a pole and asked who wanted a title shot. The entire locker room comes out on the stage lead by Bully Ray. Puts a lot of heat on the title. Hogan needs only 4. RVD vs Bully Ray. Jeff Hardy vs Ken Anderson. Jeff Hardy looks insane. Kurt Angle vs Samoa Joe. Dizamn I’m impressed with that match. The rest of the guys are put in a Wild Card Battle Royal.

I really love this. The entire show is built and leads into next week’s show. Brilliant. Hope Aries wins the battle royal.

BULLY RAY vs RVD (good opener)
The fans were into this match with plenty of claps and firmly behind RVD. Tough to grow as a company with such a small arena. The fans are hot there over the past few months. Bully Ray manages his own 3D. Nothing wrong with this match. Could have used more in crowd brawling and chairs, but I don’t think people want long matches.

BULLY RAY BACKSTAGE w/ JOSEPH PARK (brief & logical)
Afterward Bully Ray cuts a promo on the Kardashians. Joseph Park appears and provokes in the way that he does. Bully Ray tells him to stay away.

KING MO TALK SHOW (meh)
TNA has plugged the signing of King Mo throughout the show. Now this is their segment to hype that. Then they throw to a talk show with Dixie and Bellator president. TNA and Bellator signed him. I didn’t like this because it wasn’t a recap it was a segment from a talk show. Its just to promote Bellator and that MMA talkshow. Dixie made it seem like it was her idea to sign a MMA guy.

GAIL KIM & RAYNE BACKSTAGE (not as bad as it could be)
Gail is concerned about her triple threat tonight. Rayne is concerned about her mystery man. Rayne disappears. Brooke & Velvet appear to politely threaten Gail. This wasn’t bad. Normally it is.

WILD CARD BATTLE ROYAL (AJ, Gunner & Aries)
Aries appears first so TNA recaps his win over Bully Ray. ODB and Eric Young eliminate Crimson quickly. Aries eliminates Magnus. Rayne appears to look on. Interesting. I hope its Robbie E. Rob Terry is really trying to eliminate Garrett until Terry is thrown over by Robbie E. Devon throws out Robbie E. Garrett Bischoff outsmarts Devon who goes over the top. AJ then throws out Garrett. Aries and AJ face off. Interesting combination. I smell a great match if not fantastic match. Gunner is selling in the corner. Good battle royal, Tazz sells it as the best battle royal he’s seen in his life.

IMPACT GOES LIVE
Interesting. I doubt it will do much for their ratings.

KAZ & DANIELS RECAP
Good recap of a 3+ month angle that made no sense and still doesn’t make sense. I would have rather seen AJ in a hottub with Dixie. AJ is so squeaky clean that its unbelievable.

AJ PROMO
Fans have signs that say Dixie Styles and AJ Carter. Hilarious. I don’t see many signs, but these were worth the wait. AJ explains his side of things. Dixie is a beautiful, wealthy woman. Enter KAZ & Daniels who show off a video… on an iPad. The video doesn’t show me anything.

JOE & ANGLE RECAP VIDEO w/ BACKSTAGE SEGMENT (jump starting an old feud)
They showed the history of Joe. It was nice. Then they have a backstage segment that ends in a pull apart. TNA does an ok job of jumpstarting a dead feud instead of going into a new feud with them.

MR. ANDERSON BACKSTAGE (not annoying)
He is on an iPad looking at his match with Jeff Hardy. Jeff may have kicked out… I guess.

MR. ANDERSON vs JEFF HARDY
Commentators plug that Mr. Anderson and Dixie Carter will actually be in a movie / documentary with Morgan Spurlock. Its good they mention it but they needed to be a 1 minute segment. Jeff gives hugs to the fans. I’ve had no interest in this match for years. But the thought of a title shot puts heat on this match.

Jeff Hardy tries a low dropkick to the outside, Mr. Anderson catches Hardy and throws him back down to the mat. This was a good spot. There was a good pin that you don’t see very often.

KNOCKOUT TITLE >> GAIL KIM vs VELVET SKYE vs BROOKE TESSMOCHER (suggestive)
Brooke has very nice ring attire with an interesting robe. One of Gail Kim’s boot straps are hanging off. 2 faces vs 1 heel… until the heel disappears, then the faces go at it. Good submission on submission spots straight out of WWE in the late 90s. Velvet does a terrible ‘In Yo Face,’ followed by a very sexually suggestive pin.

TNA HYPE VIDEO
It was a great video with tons of crazy spots. Its funny how they say unforgettable moments, but a lot of them were forgettable except for Jarrett guitar shotting Hogan and Joe headbutting Angle. Maybe I have that backward.

JOE vs ANGLE
They’re really trying to jump start this feud again all the recaps, all of the history of Joe himself. Smells like build for Joe vs King Mo and the obvious Angle vs King Mo. Crowd is firmly behing Angle instead of both. Robert Roode appears for guest commentary. He puts over Angle and mentions their own history at last year’s Slammiversary. I thought Roode did a better job on commentary than Tazz.

Good match, but not as legendary as their past matches, but how could it be? End of the show has Jeff Hardy coming out, then Bully Ray and AJ Stylez.

Everything Wrong with TNA Impact (and how it should have been) (in my mind) (05/10/12)

BOBBY ROODE PROMO (and telegraphing the victory at the PPV)
I’m sick of Roode starting the show. He deserves to be on every show, but not starting the show. If I didn’t write this, I’d change the channel and forget about TNA. Roode doesn’t interest me at all. His gimmick and cheat to win attitude really reminds me of the fact that his character is hollow and he’s been given the default heel character.

He does say something interesting. In 2 weeks he’ll be the longest TNA champion. Cool.

RVD appears and beats up Roode who wins thenAndersonappears and beats him too. Then Jeff Hardy appears to beat him down. 3 faces on 1 heel. How does this make sense? Whatever. A better idea would be to have 3 heels on one face RVD and then RVD beats up 2 of them and Roode runs.

Hogan appears. He says there will be a four corners as the main event with a lot of stips. The face winner gets Roode, but if Roode wins he picks his opponent. If RVD wins he picks a stipulation for the PPV. This is a terrible and telegraphing idea… RVD wins and picks hardcore or some sort of match. RVD gets his win, Roode gets his win.

BULLY RAY BACKSTAGE (too brief to be good)
He cuts a promo on Austin Aries. This was brief. Bully is sick ofAustin bullying him. Bully is going to stand up to Aries.

SPRING CLEANING SALE (still sells merchandise)
Good commercial. I’m glad TNA doesn’t have Knockout merchandise. 

GAIL KIM & RAYNE BACKSTAGE (kept brief)
Gail is concerned with Brooke… Rayne says there’s a guy she’s into.

VELVET SKYE vs BROOKE TESSMOCHER (a building block for Gail vs Brooke)
This match makes sense since they teamed last week and Velvet got the last Knockout title shot. I think there’s a lot more future money in Brooke than Velvet. Brooke has 3 victories over Gail so Gail will win at the PPV. Crowd firmly behind Velvet leading me to believe she should be the one getting the title shot. I hear a Tessmocher chant at the end… but no one is chanting when I look at the crowd. Gail runs in after the match.

BULLY RAY ATTACKS MATT MORGAN (bully ray gets heat)
I think there’s a lot of money in making Crimson MMA and punches instead of cravats. Before the match starts Bully Ray attacks Matt Morgan? What? He’s making an example out of Matt Morgan. At least this means no Morgan vs Crimson. He gets good crowd heat. The commentators failed to make me care about Matt Morgan.

CRIMSON PROMO on MATT MORGAN (a glimmer of shine)
I’d rather see an arrogant or cocky Crimson. Says no one can beat him, this would have been the perfect entrance for Alex Sylvia. Instead Crimson wants a match with Matt and wants the referee to count Matt Morgan out. Yep counted out. 

RVD VIDEO
This was a character piece on RVD about how he wanted out of his little town and the cereal plant. It failed to make me root for RVD. 

X-DIVISION TITLE >> AUSTIN ARIES vs ZIMA ION
This is the first X-Division match in a month if not longer. This should be a pure squash and make Aries look great. Good amount of chants including TNA! TNA! Chants. Hot match, good energy, plenty of high flying. Chants for ‘this is wrestling.’ Funny I didn’t know wrestling was flips. The fans were emphatically behind Aries. He looks very strong.

KAZ & DANIELS BACKSTAGE (lame tease)
Wow this is still a terrible angle. KAZ has second thoughts. Daniels mutters something about his girlfriend. Daniels says AJ has been on top far too long. He hasn’t been on top for a while, at least a year. If there’s a picture I want it to be of AJ & Dixie & Traci in a hottub. 

DANIELS & KAZ & AJ ANGLE (the photo revealed)
KAZ & Daniels wait in the ring for AJ, because they’re chumps and TNA made them into chumps. AJ comes out… Daniels has a picture of AJ & Dixie… just a handshake photo. Then a second photo of AJ touching AJ’s face. Then in the third photo it looks like he’s kissing her. Kissing her as a greeting. Fans don’t care, they strongly chant AJ.

TV TITLE >>DEVON vs ROBBIE E (quick and painless)
Robbie E & Rob Terry come out in awesome sweaters. They actually plug Robbie E’s blog. Quick match. Didn’t need to be very long. Rob Terry does a beatdown after the match. I’d sayDevonvs both Terry & Robbie. 

JAMES STORM VIDEO
James plugs if it were a movie he wouldn’t have wanted it to end with the bad guy winning. Roode is back at his ranch / farm. I think this does a lot more for Storm than RVD’s video. James questions himself, and that puts heat on his loss. After the match its onto the next thing. 

JOSEPH PARK BACKSTAGE
And headed to the ring. Awesome. I’m actually excited after 2 months of him going no where. 

DEVONBACKSTAGE (quick challenge)
He challenges both Robbie E & Rob Terry. Bam!

JOSEPH PARK VIDEO
Chicago lawyer Joseph Park investigates his brother Abyss. Good little video for the whole 5 minutes he’s been on camera.

JOSEPH PARK & BULLY RAY ANGLE (this was great)
Joseph gets into the ring. Good acting of being clueless. The fans chant where’s Abyss. It was pretty heatless at first, but the fans get into it. This puts heat on Bully Ray. Joseph says he’s gonna watch from the crowd. Bully Ray appears and menaces him. Then Joseph has awesome questions for Bully before he gets shoved down. Joseph cowers before he sits and giggles like Abyss. 

RECAP >> HOGAN ARRIVES & WOLFPACK RETURNS
Hogan returns, Wolfpack returns and Hogan throws them out. Yawn. 

FOUR CORNERS >> HARDY vs RVD vs ROODE vs ANDERSON(all goes as planned)
Personally, Roode shouldn’t be in this match, it should be Angle or AJ or someone deserving. But TNA wants to give RVD a win over Roode. Crowd was rowdy and that’s a good thing. RVD wins. We will see a ladder match. Good idea for the PPV.

ABYSS APPEARS (wtf?)
Abyss appears to end the show with a message to his little brother Joseph. Wtf? … Lockdown’s main event isn’t the main angle. Great way to end Impact even if your PPV will suffer because of it.