Tag Archives: Angelina Love

Everything Wrong with TNA Impact (and how it should be) (in my mind) (6/12/14)

PROS

ERIC YOUNG’S IMPACT STORYLINE
Eric Young started the show by wanting a solo match against MVP with no interference from Bobby Lashley and Kenny King. Its a noble request, but really why should MVP who has power to agree to such things? So they agreed to have Eric Young to chose a stipulation for his title match at the Slammiversary PPV if he wins 2 out of 3 matches against Lashley, Kenny King and MVP. First up was Bobby Lashley now has two wins over TNA champion, Eric Young. It was a good match, they told a back story. The back as in body part. Its pretty rare now that wrestling works on a body part. It made sense to have the biggest guy first to injure a smaller Eric Young before he’d face the smaller Kenny King.

Eric Young wanting a cage match wants sense, heck he might want a top put on that cage too! Beating down Eric before the third match was nice too. It was also a good way to win the final match…. but you’ll read more in the cons section.

OVER ETHAN CARTER’S DEAD BODY
While the segment started out awful, Bully Ray saved the day! I liked this segment not only because he came off like a real star with the fans chanting his every word ‘over your dead body,’ he came out and showed its not women he hates. Its just Dixie Carter he hates. He came out and saved Brooke Tessmacher, even when we last saw her and Bully, he threatened to put her through a table. The glass is half full on this segment, while I could nitpick Ethan and Spud using awful comedy to get heat after following Robbie E’s comedy match, I see this as a plus, not a minus. Plus, its no longer a table match, its a Texas Death Match at this Sunday’s PPV.

CONS

CHAMPION vs CHALLENGER before the PPV
TNA must not like money, because they just had their Champion, Eric Young against the challenger MVP on free television three days from their match on PPV. Perhaps their logic is people will pay for the cage match. No. Who cares? I just saw Eric Young win and beat the challenger MVP after taking out two other men. Plus, even with a rested Eric Young against MVP, I can’t imagine them having a better match even with a cage! I remember when WCW would give away their PPV main events free on Nitro. MVP should have come out and told Eric Young, I’m not the last guy, we agreed to two out of three wins. I didn’t say I’d be guy #3. I am not a number, I am the guy you’ll face at Slammiversary. Why would MVP ever agree to this? Even if Eric Young goes over three guys… why even let Eric pick the stipulation? Because you said you would let him if he won? Well you also promised a contract vs contract match last week and that never delivered!

Even if Eric Young gets a cage match, which makes sense, MVP has a history of buying off and bullying referees into winning matches. The deck is stacked against Eric Young. Having Eric Young talk after such a brutal beating instead of being saved by the face locker room felt silly. MVP’s group beat down Eric, then they just left. Why? Because. No one chased them off. Eric Young’s beating was so meh he still spoke afterward to tell them the stipulation.

WILLOW, BRAM & MAGNUS SEGMENT
Does anyone remember when Magnus won the TNA title, he said TNA gave him goofy gimmicks. Now that Magnus is eviler than his bad guy persona, he said he’s happy to be out of that suit TNA gave him. Wow fella. Willow says WE, he and Jeff Hardy will take out Bram and Magnus, so Abyss comes out as back up. Personally I would have rather seen someone with Jeff Hardy’s size wear a Willow mask at the PPV to wrestle Magnus, then have the real Jeff Hardy run out to blow people’s minds. The funny thing in all of this is Abyss should have been the guy to make Magnus use weapons. Well the whole thing is stupid, a bad guy that said he’d do anything to win the TNA title needs to be told to use weapons? That’s more of a heel trying to turn a face heel.

ROBBIE E w/ JESSE & DJ ZIMA ION vs KNUX w/ the Menagerie
Wow the music and carnival just didn’t stop. The music and lights went through the whole match. Once is enough. This is a wrestling company, but I guess not having the music would make the stilt walkers feel out of place. This should be a good six man tag at some point for Robbie E to conquer his fears. Crazzy Steve sure interfered a lot and the referee was cool with it. Again, this is a wrestling company. Comedy has its place, but this is just a mockery of wrestling. It is awful and so limited. Everyone associated with this group or faces this group will just end up in the trash can. Also, how long before Willow is wrestling in the Menagerie. I can’t believe they’re not having a six man tag team match at the PPV, but whatever, Crazzy Steve has a title shot already. I guess he did go over KAZ a few weeks ago.

#1 KNOCKOUT CONTENDER’S MATCH: MADISON RAYNE vs BRITTANY vs GAIL KIM
Not sure how it makes sense to have this match when Rayne just lost to the Knockout Champion Angelina Love last week and Brittany lost to Angelina Love maybe a month ago. They are not in contention for the #1 contendership. If anything, they should say they just need one more shot to beat the champ. Nope. They get thrown into a three way. If anything, Velvet Skye should have faced Gail Kim as a guardian, because Gail Kim is the #1 contender, the woman that Angelina Love hasn’t beaten in a title defense this month. I guess since MVP already had a gatekeeper / guardian storyline, they couldn’t do that. Oh well. Who cares?

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Everything Wrong with TNA Impact (and how it should be) (in my mind) (5/22/14)

MVP PROMO WITH KENNY KING AND BOBBY LASHLEY (explaining why he’s heel but it doesn’t make sense)
MVP is a heel now. He explained his heel turn last week, but now he’s explaining that you can’t just be a great wrestler. You need to be a politician to get power. Yep with all that power the 3 of you clowns can’t get Eric Young’s title. MVP is good on the mic, but this is all just idiotic. King had matches against both Lashley and MVP. Well it was all a plan. Yep. Totally a plan.

WOLVES SHOW UP (and get beat down)
This explanation explained nothing. MVP hired them both. So the Wolves hit the ring. He hired them both too, perhaps are they a part of the plan? Nah. They’re upset for being used. They might have said you used us… and then jumped them! MVP’s boys would have the numbers so they’d win, or just bail because they have the power even if they don’t have the might. So MVP could book them in handicaps. You don’t bite the hand, I used you and you need to be cool with that. Why do your own dirty work when you can just make tough matches? Heck even if the Wolves were to win a tough match, that just means there’s one more match to go!

Nope two of your top faces lost the attack and get speared off a stage from Lashley. Then Kenny King giggles like a schoolgirl or laughs like the 1970s Joker. I can see TNA’s ratings dropping. Its just another heel faction in power.

ERIC YOUNG STORMS IN BACKSTAGE

ERIC CARTER III AND AUNT DIXIE ARRIVE

ERIC YOUNG TRIES TO CUT A PROMO AND GETS CUT OFF BY MVP
Holy fuck why can’t we get past evil factions? Why are there no face factions to spit in their faces and take them out? If Abyss is a face again, why can’t Eric go to Abyss and say, back me up? He can say Abyss, you like hurting people, help me hurt people. Sure Abyss can just turn on Eric Young or Abyss can point out that MVP gave him a job again, but its worth a shot. Eric can go to Austin Aries even. Then they go to the one remaining Wolf and have a 6 man?

Beatdown and Rescue by Austin Aries followed by a challenge!
Eric Young mentions Bobby Lashley sold out. MVP mentions that Lashley didn’t take a shortcut yet yes he did. Oh well. Eric Young says passionate words before attacking and getting beat down by three men. Aries runs in. He must have just gotten there like Eric Young got there 5 or so minutes ago. I have a feeling Aries is really with MVP because he’s wearing black and he fought against MVP. So it makes sense by TNA logic that he’ll turn on Eric Young Later.

Anyway, I smell a 6 man match. Nope. MVP vs Austin Aries

BRAM CONVINCES A HEEL MAGNUS TO BE A HEEL (its crazy i know)
Magnus says he’s getting tired of Brahm so he punches Bram, who laughs and says that’s what we want. Then Magnus helps him up. Huh? ok.

ANGELINA LOVE ISSUES AN OPEN CHALLENGE AND GETS JUMPED BY ANGELINA LOVE (because faces need to weaken heels by using heel tactics).
I can’t keep up with this typing. There could have been a brawl, but after Love throws the first punch.

DAVEY RICHARDS STRETCHERED AWAY (where was his tag partner?)
At least show his partner in the shot. His partner must not give a fuck that his teammate is being stretchered out. Maybe he’s injured somewhere himself. SHOW HIM. Maybe I missed him.

ANGELINA LOVE vs  NOT GAIL KIM (its really Brittany)
We’re now around 25 – 30 minutes in and its the first match. It was a little dumb of Angelina to issue an open challenge, and it excludes all former champions. That works. Otherwise I was going to say the challenge was answered before Gail got there. Gail and Love is the money match. Brittany is the jobber and should be in this case. The referee was distracted by Velvet Skye…. YET VELVET COULDN’T HELP CHRIS SABIN! Gail Kim clears house after the match. Sadly, I just don’t care about Gail vs Love as the money match. I still have 0 interest.

KEN AND JAMES STORM AT A BAR (heel and face role reversal)
Ken wants to play games, James Storm is hostile. James Storm came across as a face and Ken Anderson was just a joke. Beer drinking contest later.

AUSTIN ARIES vs MVP (because men of power fight their own battles)
It is a great match on paper. A money match even, but the logic behind the match is just backward. No president, or king fight their own battles. A man of power should not fight his own battles and if he were to fight his own battles, why would he want to face someone one on one? People of power should be untouchable!!! That’s why Dixie is hiding from Bully Ray.

The match ends with Kenny King causing a DQ via interference. Why not just start the match that way? Why even wrestle? Eric Young runs in and gets beat down. Its just a numbers game. Mike Tennay says everyone is frightened for their jobs. Well if MVP was going to fire anyone… why hasn’t he? MVP announces Lashley vs Eric Young. why doesn’t the title match START RIGHT NOW?

DIXIE INTERRUPTS (and it makes less sense)
MVP asks her didn’t he ban her from Impact? Well the new heel faction moves in on the old faction. Two heels arguing. Dixie says she doesn’t interfere. Yet she’s interfering right there. Dixie says she can do something for MVP. Enter Bully Ray who chases away Dixie and Ethan Carter. MVP asks Bully why he’s there when they’ve been banned?

BULLY AND MVP FACE OFF LEADING TO FACEOFF AGAINST DIXIE CARTER (faces need to attack in numbers)
Bully even wonders why MVP is picking on Eric Young. Soon gets jumped by 3 men. Well with Bully Ray beat down, Dixie tells Ethan to get the tables. For someone so entitled, he should have his butler Spud get the tables. While this was a good balancing of momentum, they were banned. MVP could have had security escort them out where they do this all outside. But well this is wrestling. And again, why don’t these faces attack in numbers?

GUNNER & DEXTER IN PADDED ROOM
Well, Gunner has a serious message about things. Which is good. Its a good message. Gunner will be there for Dexter. Who’s Dexter? I don’t know. Is he still obsessed about Christy Hemme? Is that why he’s in there. Gunner wants to get the straight jacket off of him. You know he can’t leave until you’re discharged.

THE LONE WOLF EDDY EDWARDS vs KENNY KING (because 1 face didn’t learn from every other face that lost)
Why does he want a piece of them in the ring? Why not attack backstage? Why attack them by yourself when the 3 of them will just clobber you? Plus why would Kenny King just go out there by himself? I have a feeling the other 2 will just jump the Lone Wolf Eddy Edwards. If only he went to the hospital with his partner. All of these polite one on one matches make me think some face must be booking matches to be this nice. Nope a heel in charge is making these one on one matches. Perhaps if he told us that with all of these faces weakened earlier in the show he has no doubts that they won’t be able to divide and conquer mono e mono.

The majority of the match takes place outside, but I don’t think its a match. Shouldn’t there be security pulling them apart. You know they do have a regularly scheduled program to go on, but no these two guys are brawling in the ring. Kenny King wins this non match.

DRINKING CONTEST >> JAMES STORM OVER KEN ANDERSON
Yep. Ken gets James beer like he’s a bitch, but I think Ken is getting the heel wasted to make it easier to beat him up. Its like Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd.

MVP BUYS OFF A REF BACKSTAGE (not with money)

JAMES STORM & KEN ANDERSON DRUNK
Enough. Ken Anderson beats down James Storm. Ken could have just broke a bottle over his head an hour ago.

ERIC YOUNG BACKSTAGE PROMO (yep, he’s not 100% but Lashley will get 100% of what he’s got left)
Eric says he’ll show Lashley how crazy he’ll get. I want garbage cans, chairs, cheating. TNA always had an obscure DQ loses a title in a title match. However, this isn’t a title match? Why? Maybe MVP wants to weaken Eric Young before MVP takes the title/ I’ll never know. TNA didn’t explain that.

ERIC YOUNG vs BOBBY LASHLEY (I predict a 3 on 1 with a bought ref)
While I really like Eric Young, he’s not really dazzling in the ring. He doesn’t make me feel its a main event. TNA has never been one for a big drama, slow told story in the ring like the WWE has bee. TNA is more of the dynamic guys that can fly, mat wrestle and do anything in the ring (even if the past 3 major championship runs have been dull, limited heels for 2 – 3 years). I’m shocked that TNA hasn’t turned Eric heel yet, like other top recent champions. He’s still a great, strong champion that goes over clean, but I just don’t think there’s anything that sets him above the rest in terms of in the ring. He’s not flashy, even if he’s a solid champion with the crowd firmly behind him.

Naturally Kenny King and MVP run in, but the referee is cool with it. Well what the fuck. There is no sport in wrestling. One day they’ll really piss Eric Young off by shaving his beard! Austin Aries runs in well after the victory…. to get beat down! Oh you faces. Coordinate your attacks so its not always 2 on 3 or 1 on 3. Mike Tennay says everyone is intimidated by MVP.

PROS:

  • The way the open challenge was handled
  • Momentum balance between Bully and Ethan

CONS:

  • Faces can’t work as a unit to overthrow new heel faction
  • Solo matches with a heel in charge
  • Referee distracted by Velvet Skye’s ass when she couldn’t help Chris Sabin win a few months ago
  • 0 interest in Gail vs Love even with a build
  • Talking, lots of talking
  • Heel faction was everywhere!

Everything Wrong with TNA Impact (and how it should have been) (in my mind) (04/05/12)

HULK HOGAN PROMO introduced by DIXIE CARTER (match announcements)
Wow what ego stroking.Dixie has Sting in the ring. They both couldn’t look average enough. In fact I saw members of the crowd that looked like bigger stars. Speaking of stars, TNA had all of its wrestlers surrounding the ring. Way to make the entire roster look like extras and background players.

Hogan plugs Lockdown and announces matches. Morgan vs Crimson at Lockdown. Knockouts challenge for #1 contender tonight. Hogan calls out Bischoff and Ric Flair on the floor argues with Hogan. Oh so Bischoff isn’t out there… either is Roode who then appears with a security force wearing suits. Well at least TNA makes him look like a star.

As I predicted any babyface as an authority figure becomes the top babyface and the top babyface that wrestles each week is always #2.Andersongets called into the ring after Roode says his piece. I never want to hearAndersontalk and thankfully he doesn’t.Andersonvs Roode is announced for tonight. Hogan then announces Jeff Hardy vs Kurt Angle for right now. I smell a lumberjack match!

JEFF HARDY vs KURT ANGLE (rushed match)
Tazz says this is a main event anywhere in the world… yep but on TNA it opens the card… because they like blowing their money matches. Eh whatever, maybe it will be a minute long and end with some cheap finish. Angle’s right leg is either hideously pale or it is taped up. Remember how I typed that I smell a lumberjack match. Nope. No chance. After a few minutes they fall to the outside and Jeff Hardy has to break the count right before he throws Kurt back in. That made little sense. Maybe with the count at 8, Jeff didn’t want to get counted out by throwing in Kurt first.

Kurt is busted open in the ring. Thankfully TNA cameras didn’t catch the blade. Eric Young’s bachelor party will air tonight. This match has good crowd enthusiasm, but it feels very rushed. Several minutes in when Angle applies the ankle lock, he is still standing. I’ve always had a problem with the standing ankle lock. It makes more sense to drop and let the guy drag you instead of letting them kick you or roll you up, but whatever.

Good finish to a match that builds to a pay-per-view in a cage. Good match, I still say it felt very rushed, but had some good energy and crowd reaction. Angle gets backstage and Hogan announces a cage match with him and Jeff Hardy. I guess I don’t have a problem with giving this match away for free to build to a pay-per-view.

FLAIR BACKSTAGE on the speaker phone with BISCHOFF
Yep Flair warns Bischoff.

BULLY RAY BACKSTAGE
Bully is trending worldwide. He gets asked Storm or Roode at Lockdown. Bully Ray says he’s the next world champion. Bully heads to the ring to call out Austin Aries.

BULLY RAY & ARIES ANGLE (great for both guys)
Bully Ray is calfzilla. He cuts down Austin Aries for his lack of size. Aries then appears. Aries acts like he is gonna cut a promo and ends up popping Bully with the microphone. After a beatdown, Bully Rag gives him a walking, diving powerbomb. It looked awesome and was worth a replay. This was great for both guys.

JOESEPH PARK BACKSTAGE (a waste of time)
Joe asks the caterer, because his brother has a ravenous appetite. You know Hulk once saw Abyss’s face. Hmmm… Oh but no one remembers that.

AJ STYLES BACKSTAGE (and a challenge)
He things James will win. AJ is now wearing gloves. Storm appears to challenge AJ. Eh this works and keeps Storm fresh with matches. AJ should want a title shot if he beats Storm and if Storm beats Roode at Lockdown.

KNOCKOUTS CHALLENGE >> MICKIE JAMES vs TARAvs WINTER vs ANGELINA LOVE vs MADISON RAYNE vs VELVET SKYE (and flawed logic)
Winter is announced from parts unknown. I could swear she’s fromEngland somewhere. If she had an American accent, I’d say she’s fromAlaska. Or how about the clouds above? Looks like Angelina is just a heel instead of with Winter. I hate to admit it, but Winter and Rayne have my two favorite themes in TNA. Why? I guess because they sound different from any other theme.

Apparently this match is the first fall with only 2 people at a time with the need to tag out. Strange. Why would anyone tag in? Just blind tags I guess. A match like this should either be 6 at a time or offer a punishment for the loser. Otherwise there is no reason to tag out. If I had to predict a winner, I’d say Velvet Skye, because that’s who won last week, but knowing TNA it could be Winter. If this was the WWE I’d say Rosita, because she’s not even in the match.

There is an awesome spot where Velvet is in with Rayne, who then tags out to Mickie James to make face vs face. When Mickie goes to get in Rayne kicks her out. This becomes a spotfest like all big matches. In the end, one woman is standing tall, which is great, because usually TNA has this problem of when there’s a winner everyone is in the ring, so you don’t get a visual of one person being above the rest.

ANDERSONBACKSTAGE with ROODE (less annoying than usual)
Anderson is backstage. Roode appears with his suited bodyguards.Anderson wonders why wait til tonight when we can fight right now? Isn’t right now tonight? Whatever. The suits get inAnderson’s face he touches their ties. They’ll wait til later tonight.

TNA at CMAs (with Kiss)
You get to see Jeff Hardy and James Storm posing with Kiss. I swear this was CMAs… Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe it is the ACMs or whatever. I wonder how much Gene Simmons asked to be paid for standing in the background. 

ERIC YOUNG’s BACHELOR PARTY (and how lame it is)
3 nerds with Eric Young picking fantasy baseball online. ODB appears to give the men a party. Insults the men and chases them away. She’s subtly chasing away everyone from Eric Young. They might as well have Eric put in a closet. She then pulls Eric close for a face full of cleavage.

JAMES STORM vs AJ STYLEZ (AJ is still a star)
Montgomery Gentry is in the crowd and James says hi. This could be awesome, but since this is TNA I see it going 4 minutes. AJ looks very strange with gloves. I like how the crowd is chanting for AJ who is the midcarder. Early on AJ summersaults out of the way of the Last Call. I think TNA should just call it Last Call instead of Last Call Super Kick. Tennay plugs the MotorCity Machine Guns are next.

This match has some good logical counters and reversals, such as elbows to a rear waist lock to break the clasp. Good match, the crowd is firmly behind AJ for 80% of the match. It is interesting to see their physiques when both of them started out with the same skinny body 10 years ago. Good finish with the winner checking on his friend. This match made AJ look good and actually show his stuff.

James Storm gets on the mic and wants Robert Roode next week to look him in the eye one last time before Lockdown.

HOGAN & STING BACKSTAGE
Hogan sends Sting home. Sting says the doctors won’t let him compete. Good. Use Sting sparingly.

MONTGOMERY GENTRY BACKSTAGE w/ ROBERT ROODE
They lightly put over TNA and put over James Storm. Robert Roode appears and spits in the face of Montgomery Gentry. This was good. Hopefully TNA

MOTORCITY MACHINE GUNS vs MEXICAN AMERICA (terrible missed opportunity)
Sabin was injured one year ago in a botched spot against Mexican America. TNA really should have put this on pay-per-view with some hype behind it. People would pay money to see their return or at least their first match into their return. By just throwing out the guns it felt like Sabin had never left and he was just a regular guy. There were brief, emphatic chants of ‘Welcome back.’ But there were more chants of ‘Motor city.’

Personally, if I were Sabin, I’d be working on Anarchya’s knee to take him out and make him disappear for a while (to OVW). There was a spot where Shelly flew off the top and landed on Anarchya who had his knees bent. Not a block, just coincidental. Anyway, the Guns looked awesome.

Sabin gets on the mic and says he wants the titles. He doesn’t mention how great it is to be back.

RIC FLAIR BACKSTAGE intercepts ERIC BISCHOFF
Flair says Hogan is out of control. Eric calls Ric a two time hall-of-famer. Flair says that Hogan is out of control because he’s making matches for Lockdown. Oh no! An authority figure making matches? TNA plugs a Bischoff & Hogan in the ring for a confrontation.

HOGAN & BISCHOFF ANGLE
Hogan is in the ring and calls out Bischoff who then appears. Thank goth this wasn’t the main event after the last match. I’m much happier with this match under the main event. Eric Bischoff says blah blah blah. This is something I’ve heard from him so many times. Against Garrett Bischoff, Vince McMahon, Steve Austin. Probably other guys too.

Hogan says that Eric needs to put together a team for Lockdown and Garrett will make the other team. I like this idea. Garrett doesn’t need to be in a singles cage match. Hmmm Gunner & Mexican America vs Garrett & uh… Anthony Neese & D-Von.

If Garrett loses he’s off TNA and if Eric’s team loses he can no longer use his own name for the rest of his life. Yep… Maybe he will be Bob Smith.

STORM VIDEO
A great video recap with the split of Beer Money interviewing Storm and people from his life, his friends, wife, and family. Storm even has a baby in his arms. James Storm is Joe Everyman. This video was good and it really pushes Storm vs Roode as something special to TNA.

MR. ANDERSON vs ROBERT ROODE (what match?)
Andersonsays Mr. Anderson.Anderson. Then walks to the ring. Ken Anderson looks terrible, like he’s ill with the flu and they’re making him wrestle. Maybe he has food poisoning or something. He also wears a shirt that says ‘pro wrestling is real.’ Since he has the sleeves well cut off, it looks like the shirt says ‘no wrestling is real.’ At least Mr. Anderson has a win going into this match and at least Robert Roode has a fresh match that doesn’t involve Hardy, Bully or Storm. Wow Bobby is thin compared to the TNA title. He only has 1 set of buttons buttoned. Maybe TNA needs magnets on the belt to keep the strap from just flapping like that.

For whatever reasonAndersonhas 33 on the back of his wrestling trunks, is that his age? Is that the highway he lives next to? Tennay announces that there will be a series of matches between team Garrett vs team Gunner. I like how no one really pays attention to the match in the ring. The commentators just recap what we’ve seen and what we will see.

Ref bump. Ken Anderson gets the visionary. Well I smell the first feud after Roode loses the title at Lockdown. Heck he might not even lose the title and this might be the main event program after Lockdown. Beer bottle finish. Poor referee has to count in the glass.Andersonis bleeding. I also like how no one can say Bobby Roode, they always say Bobby Rooooo.

James Storm appears with Hogan. That’s like a boy appearing with his dad to confront a bully. Good job TNA. Hogan reverses the decision. Maybe this was inAnderson’s contract where he needs to get a win over Bobby Roooo. After that final match, I just have a bad taste in my mouth.

Everything Wrong with TNA Impact (and how it should have been) (in my mind) (03/01/12)

TNA OPENING VIDEOS
Video recaps how dumb the Roode & Storm ‘I’m done’ statement was.
Kurt Angle has cue cards to explain why he did what he did to Jeff Hardy. He’s laughing because he knows how stupid this is…
TNA got a new intro. Looks good … but generic. No intensity to the opening. It doesn’t get me fired up to watch TNA, but it does look good. 

KURT ANGLE PROMO (to explain how stupid his program is with Jeff Hardy)
Look he has cue cards because he knows how stupid this is, so he’s gonna make it stupider. Jeff Hardy is not a wrestler he’s a performance artist. Jeff Hardy reminds me how fake wrestling is with his loose and sloppy work. That was not part of his speech. That’s my speech. Kurt Angle’s top reasons to hate Hardy are meh at best… bottom line is that he’s jealous of Jeff Hardy. This should have been explained half a month ago… OR THEY COULD HAVE STARTED THE FEUD BETTER! 

An Olympic gold medalist even from a decade ago should be dominating a backyard wrestling risk taker. To me… Jeff Hardy should be proving he’s the wrestler that I think he’s not. And by I… that means Kurt Angle. The Olympian shouldn’t be jealous he should be dominant and a joke like Jeff shouldn’t hold a candle to him and Jeff should train mat wrestling to even hang with Kurt. Then Kurt Angle destroys hardy at the PPV… and Hardy challenges Kurt to his type of match, a ladder match. Then it is tied 1 – 1 with all the marbles in a match that benefits neither man. Do this over the span of 4 or 5 months.

ROBERT ROODE BACKSTAGE INTERVIEW (and then Aries enters)
Austin Aries is over because he’s the top dog in his division. Personally I feel Aries is the top heel if not top star and they should open up his pool. If someone on top like Angle or Bully or Roode disappears, Aries should lose his title and take their place. 

TNA MERCH COMMERCIAL (and how stupid it is)
It is March, let’s sell jerseys. All of the Knockouts in the commercial are wearingJerseys… so they must be selling them. How much? Who the hell knows. But… Knockouts are wearing them or it’s to hype up basketball. Perhaps an AJ Styles basketball jersey or a Bully Ray one for the heels. I’ve noticed TNA has 2 weeks of commercials with the Knockouts then 2 weeks of commercials that sell merchandise. The point is selling merchandise not using the Knockouts under contract. 

GAUNTLET MATCH >> AJ vs DANIELS (a staple of AJ’s month)
AJ wants answers… well Kurt Angle gave answers… so why not Daniels giving answers? At least this match has heat on it unlike the last 2 times they had it. Sure it’s a good match, but they have burnt it out for me and they need to make me want to see it and promise of an answer gets heat on the match. As I’ve said for weeks feuding over a title could get heat on their feud and the belt even if it is the TNA title. AJ would have something Daniels and KAZ both want. Daniels and KAZ or AJ & KAZ can light a fire in the TNA tag division. 

GAUNTLET MATCH >> AJ vs KAZ (excellent)
This was handled excellently. Kudos TNA with how this was handled. Didn’t give away the match. But there’s one problem… now we’re still searching for an answer.

ODB vs RAYNE (and a storyline that combines 2 of TNA’s favorite things)
So the Rayne vs Kim program combines 2 of TNA’s favorite things… a feuding tag team and heel vs heel for the championship. Then this match combines another one of TNA’s things… Eric Young. ODB still has heat because of Eric. Eric should still be a manager of someone dull like Crimson or Shannon Moore. PreferablyShannon. 

This was a bad match with way too much going on. EY running around, Gail pretending to run in. The right woman won, but your #1 contender lost. I smell a TNA Knockout’s tag title defense at the next pay-per-view… which I assume isVictory Road, but a trailer or some hype for the PPV itself would help.

BULLY RAY BACKSTAGE (and about Storm Storm Storm Storm)
Oh Christ not another Bully Ray vs Storm match (it seemed like it). I don’t want to see another for 3 months. TNA should have kept that match for a PPV. Now I don’t care. Bully, Angle, Roode, Hardy, Storm and Sting are money for TNA. They need to stay away from one another unless it’s for money. I don’t want to see matches on free TV when they are the moneymen. I’d rather see Bully Ray vs Shannon Moore, Storm vs Daniels, Roode vs Morgan, Angle vs Crimson every month than seeing a constant combination of those 6 guys every week.

VELVET / ANGELINA / SARITA BACKSTAGE BRAWL
Thank goth this was kept to less than a minute. Their backstage brawls always went too long. Thank goth Velvet didn’t talk for more than 5 seconds. I still remember how Sarita the heel was looking good as a face over that heelish face Velvet Skye. Then they come back from commercial to have Velvet complain longer and get beat down longer. Remember what I just said about at least it wasn’t long. I take it back. This was too long. Why was it Angelina and Sarita and not Sarita and Rosita or Angelina and Winter. This wasn’t the worst segment, but it sets up a match for later on.

FLAIR to GARRETT BACKSTAGE
Flair promo. I’m sure people will love it. I didn’t care. Flair got paid. 

ROODE, ARIES & BULLY RAY PROMO (and why a heel authority is better than  a face)
Heel promo. I’ve heard Roode talk way too much. Please pass the mic. If you have something more interesting to say that doesn’t sound the same as last week then please say it! Roode is done afterVictory Road. Bully talks about his calves and he blames Sting for bringing in Brandon Jaccobs. So the heels have a problem with face management. I’m not sure I like heels complaining against a face authority figure instead of a heel authority figure and the faces fighting the authority. Sure it’s been done before and maybe that’s why they went the other route. That and it puts too much heat on Sting, because a face authority figure will fight by himself instead of a heel authority figure will throw wave after wave of wrestler! Several wrestlers have the heat put on them by authority. 

Austin Aries makes sense and he delivers intensity. I appreciate and enjoy his promos and logic instead of Roode’s promos that just drone on with no real logic behind them. Again if some main eventer gets injured, Aries should take the place. Imagine Aries vs Storm, Aries vs AJ, Aries vs Hardy. Maybe Aries isn’t in their pay grade.

Sting appears and verbally makes sense that they’re all wrestlers and they need money. Sting makes the main event, halfway through the show. I can imagine how that would bother some people. 

JESSE SORENSEN UPDATE
Oh no don’t talk about him getting back into the ring. No talk about getting back to being able to sit up. Its great that he will return, but it’s a long term thing, lets work on being able to sit up. 

ZIMA ION BACKSTAGE PROMO
This was great, but I guess I didn’t want to hear it at the moment. 

ZIMA vs SHANNON
Good I’m happy they have this match. Zima is coming into his own with his ugly ass fro and arrogance. Good throw away match. Good to seeShannon. Good flashy maneuvers. It is a shame when a top rope head scissors doesn’t finish someone off. Very good flashy finisher that looks very safe, a backward fireman’s carry into an over knee face buster. Very good. Especially after my complaints for the past three weeks. Zima is coming along nicely and evolving into something all within the past month. 

TNA LIVE EVENTS COMMERCIALS (and how awesome they are)
These little commercials really sell TNA live events. As much as I’ve complained about the TNA Shopzone commercials being terrible, these are awesome and sell the interaction that you get when attending a TNA live event even if its not televised.

VELVET & MICKIE vs SARITA & ANGELINA
I don’t think they need a reason for this match. Mickie gets ratings, Sarita is great in the ring, Velvet is TNA’s golden girls and Angelina is underrated and been stuck in the mud for at least a year. Mike Tennay & Tazz talk about entertainment in music and TV, not exactly sure why, but whatever. Maybe it is to make TNA seem more current. This match had a lot more energy and heat than ODB vs Rayne earlier on tonight, which is a surprise since there is no reason for this match to be so good. At the end of all of this… it means nothing. 

ABYSS DISAPPEARED (he’s gone)
I have this crazy idea… feed men to Abyss. 1 minute jobs, intense, powerful destructions against Moore, Anthony Neese, and Doug Williams. Destroy them. Feed your monster for a month before you sent out a gladiator to take on the monster and build to that. First Crimson. Abyss can laugh at the boy trying to take him out. Feed Crimson to Abyss. Then Morgan. Month by month… Abyss eats 3 jobbers for lunch with an even match at the PPV. After a few months of destroying people have him go through a main eventer like Hardy or Bully Ray. Then take on the top face or top heel and that’s where Abyss can get defeated in 5 months. A man who has destroyed wrestlers and won 16 matches in a row finally falls to your great warrior. It is simple booking or have him go through your champion or top warrior too and become an unstoppable monster that can last another 6 months. But I guess they’re busy pushing Roode as a cheat to win champion. 

STORM / MAGNUS / JOE vs ROODE / ARIES / BULLY RAY (and why I give a damn)
You know what I’m thrilled at this, a fresh main event. Sure it still involves the 3 guys I complain about, but that’s only 50% of the match. It elevates Aries, Joe and Magnus. Those three that I mentioned each have a fire under them right now with the fans firmly behind them and a hunger for them. Those 2 things mean a lot. Fans chant for Joe and Aries. The one complaint is when did Joe & Magnus turn? Oh it doesn’t matter; they’re faces in the eyes of the fans due to their amazing chemistry, speed and finesse. Everything that Aries has as well.

It was a great start that was generously slow burning. My first complaint was when Storm was tagged in and Roode bailed… Storm just stopped dead in his tracks, he should have attacked Bully Ray, Aries and gone to the floor to fight Roode before getting poked in the eyes and beaten down. That’s not what I want to see in your top face… I don’t want a guy that just stops dead in his tracks. Maybe if they had weapons or something. Your top face should be able to take out everyone but your top heel. Oh and to top it off Storm has tangled with Roode a few times since being screwed out of the title a few months ago.

Joe & Bully Ray. This could be a money match and just this sample of it is awesome. I’m sure if this wasJapanthey’d work a 20 minute classic, but since this isAmericait would be slow when they have a 1 on 1 match. Speaking of Joe, wow his chest is red.

This match has a fire to it that I haven’t seen in months for TNA. The crowd is chanting for workers in the ring. The match has a freshness seeing Joe in there with anyone. It has me getting into this match and that’s something I haven’t said about a TNA Impact match in months.

Storm has a fire in his hot tag and this feels like a main event and not just another match. I actually give a damn about who will win and there it was.

As for the post match I would have had a celebration, but hey it’s TNA. Gotta end it on a low note, at least they didn’t just cut to some Sting angle.